M.I.A

christmas season and making the kcf banquet video for u dub is going to keep me from blogging for a while.

I'll make sure to take tons of photos and catch up later though.

iTunes Challenge: Day 1

According to itunes, i have 6.4 days worth of music. I havne't listen to all of the songs so I've decided that before the new year, i'm going to listen to everything and blog about my favourites :) It'll be good considering I just downloaded a whole bunch of albums of korean artists that are non-mainstream and I have yet to listen to all of it.

Going to organize everything by file size so I don't listen to the same artist and get sick of them. I'm not expecting much out of the first couple cuz they're all intros or snippets of songs.

chestnuts roasting by the open fire

It's snowing like crazy outside and I took this last year, but it seriously gets me every time how much it can snow in waterloo. And listening to Michael Buble while being toasty in the library

soundtrack in film

I was thinking of what courses to take and I realized I think i want to take some fun non-program related courses. After all isn't university supposed to be about exploring what's out there and broadening your perspectives?

So one of my friends suggested Soundtrack in Film. They're 3 hour lectures (boo) but it sounds pretty cool.

Here's the course syllabus:
Week 1: Course Introduction, What to Listen For in Film
Week 2: Technical Details, How It’s Done
Week 3: Early History, The Silent Era
Week 4: The Birth of Sound, and the Orchestra in Hollywood
Week 5: Film Music Comes of Age (1940-1950)
Week 6: The 1950s and Hitchcock/Herrmann
Week 7: The 1960s/Goldsmith
Week 8: The 1970s/Williams
Week 9: The 1980s/Horner
Week 10: The 90s
Week 11: Music From and Inspired by the film

Considering I used to think of my life in terms of soundtracks, I think this might be a cool course to take hehe

first exam of fall 2010

wrote my first exam today - coronary. It was open book so it was quite okay. My notes were so sick and pro at being tabbed that it was really easy to go through.

Ruth, Sarah and I have been sleeping in the living room (we sleep on mine and ruth's mattresses) and we were supposed to all wake up together and do morning devotions before going into this exam period but 1) i was frantically trying to print all my notes and 2) we woke up quite late.

HOpefully we can do it tomorrow :)


Currently in dwe with a couple friends studying. It's kind of depressing considering there's no windows and there's a huge drawing of mcdonald's on the front chalkboard with "공부하자 - let's study" written right next to it.. WHAT a tease...

ugly ducklings

"i'd rather be rough around the edges than smooth and pretty. i think it gives me character"

a couple of us were talking about how the 88 girls of KCF are so girly. The 90 girls are too. We were wondering what happened to us. I thought maybe girliness skips a generation but even the 91 girls are pretty girly. Yet us 89-ers... we're so manly, kind of scary, sometimes cynical, jaded, violent, etc.

but it doesn't matter. I'm loving getting to know the 89 girls more in depth this term and especially living with two of them has been a huge blessing. Getting to know each other on a deeper level and learning to pray and encourage each other not only in our school lives but in the spiritual aspects has gotten me excited for next fall when we're all in waterloo together (minus a certain ditcher who went to pharmacy =P ). When the ditcher came back, it was quite awesome to see how we've changed and yet how we are still exactly the same as our first year selves.

i love the quirkiness of these girls and to be honest.. i think we're quite exciting. I laugh every day because of them (and at them sometimes hehe). Gah, I can't wait to grow old with these girls =)

photo update

Really hate blogspot's photo uploading.. seriously considering switching over to tumblr. Thoughts?

studying with philemon and reminiscing about old photos teehee


will and his pink tie that he refuses to wear to banquet


the ghettoness of philemon's door


Birthday cake from someone's birthday - I have to admit, it looks pretty but definitely was one of my least favourite cakes


icicles sarah and I found outside of DP on a tree


Aw joseph yoo is so cute hahaha


leuis is a justin beiber wannabe...


after a bit of drinking, leuis is crazier than ever =P


Ruth is just crazy on her own =P After doing a mask



decapitated gingerbread man. muahahahhaa


owning jocelyn in monopoly deal

psalm 42

I'm not going to post the whole passage but two people gave me this chapter as encuoragement which i thought was pretty cool. Just how the whole passage is about how the writer feels really down and is so earnestly seeking God but doesn't know what to do at the same time - I know that feeling so well. And then at the end, it goes

¹¹ Why, my soul, are you downcast?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and my God.

Seriously, like let that be true in my life too!

I slept like crap yesterday just because I think I'm really stressed about a lot of things. But in the words of a great friend,

you just need to finish exams
hahahahaha
i know it's a long way away.. but once you're done! trust me... you'll feel a lot better =(

being direct

"One productive day is always followed by an unproductive day" - Lillian Leung

Day one. 9.5 hours at DC library
Day two. sleeping and rolling around
Day three. playing and eating
Today. it was gloomy outside. that's my excuse

starting to feel the stress

i need a car..

because i got timmies today and the coffee was BURNT!
the only close enough alternative is williams which is mad expesnvie...

no title

When we insist on details we miss out on quite a bit - PJoe

running man

you need to be able to use both your arms AND legs to be able to run; so sometimes god ties your legs so you learn to run with your arms.

- Rev. Han via P. Will

study music

Alice sent me this

http://www.youtube.com/user/StudyMusicProject#p/c/9/yvHF99zvmyc

Dolly - it made me think of you and how you always have Yiruma's River Flows in You on repeat. Try this for a variation :)

Dreams

I have notes on my iphone and some of them are random things from random places. I realized some of the sentences don't make sense but are still thought provoking. I was just going through my phone and found the following:


"dream that launches a movement"

It makes me wonder... will any of my dreams ever launch a movement? I dont' think i'm much of a revolutionary or someone who's going to make an impact one the world. Who knows, maybe I will become one or God will use me to be one?

To be honest though, I think I'll be quite content with being used to launch a movement in the people around me - to impact the way even a single person thinks or experiences life.

Just a thought :)


on the other hand, I realized that my productivity level late at night is very difficult to keep up :)

Encouraging Words

Just got an email from my pastor with encouraging words:

Don't try to run the world, or your world, or try to bear that weight
They're such simple words but I think the way they're put made me realize further how silly it is to try to control your own life. "controlling my life" seems so simple.. but "controlling my world" seems impossible.

Another good friend of mine sent me 1Peter 5:1-11.
"God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble and oppressed."
I am SUCH a proud person. I hate showing people weakness, I hate showing people that I can't do something, I hate asking for help.
But at the same time, I really DO want to be a humble person.

Humble yourselves, therefore, under Gods mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
I think I'm still learning what this means... to put myself in His hands; to cast my anxiety on him. For me, I think I'm really okay with putting long-term things in His hands. I know that in the end, He'll use me for something but it's the getting there that gets me agitated and I don't know what to do with myself..

Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.
Yea, this is so not me. Just the fact that I like to bury my sadness I think makes me less alert of myself and my relationship with God and with others. Being someone who can't think straight or isn't really in touch with her emotions is actually kind of distractingly frustrating.

Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your fellow believers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.
People have been SO encouraging and I actually REALLY thank God for that. I think i'm slowly and painfully starting to dig the ground so that i can rebuild a firm foundation and the fact that thre are people praying for me who have gone through this kind of thing is even more encouraging

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.
Yes. This is the reason I don't break out crying every day anymore -haha. I'm definitely excited for the end and I guess now, even, the process.

To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen.


1 Peter 5:1-11

Take My Life

Take my life and let it be
consecrated, Lord, to Thee.
Take my moments and my days,
let them flow in ceaseless praise.
Take my hands and let them move
at the impulse of Thy love.
Take my feet and let them be
swift and beautiful for Thee.

Take my voice and let me sing
always, only for my King.
Take my lips and let them be
filled with messages from Thee.
Take my silver and my gold
not a mite would I withhold.
Take my intellect and use
every power as You choose.

Here am I, all of me.
Take my life, it's all for Thee.

Take my will and make it Thine
it shall be no longer mine.
Take my heart it is Thine own
it shall be Thy royal throne.
Take my love, my Lord I pour
at Your feet its treasure store
Take myself and I will be
ever, only, all for Thee.
Take myself and I will be
ever, only, all for Thee.

Here am I, all of me.
Take my life, it's all for Thee.

Take my life, Lord take my life. Take all of me)

Here am I, all of me.
Take my life, it's all for Thee

Part 1: Temporary Home

December 22nd is the KCF banquet and as I encourage people to come, I'm realizing more and more how much KCF is changing. It's weird because I don't think I realized how fast it had changed. THe people have changed, I'm finding myself as one of the older ones (to my dismay), and the dynamics have changed as well.

It's not a bad thing - I think there's a lot more bonding than when I used to go to KCF as a frosh and I think there's a lot of huge vision from the exec team. It's weird because I haven't been able to see it until now and I think God's been blessing me IMMENSELY this week even with opening my eyes to so many things.

There's way too many but one of them is that the hope that this is my temporary home :) Someone shared this song with me and it's quite great hehe

Finding Rest

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light"

I'm really trying to find what gives me rest these days. I asked my parents and both of them said QT in their own ways - my mom it's just spending her GO train ride praying; my dad it's Lectio Divina. For others, it's through taking walks in nature and for others, it's through praise.

I don't know how to take rest. Phil once asked me how I take care of myself and I realize that I don't. Sure, I play a lot, but I think playing, doing dishes, and rearranging furniture are all ways I run away from my problems and give me that time that I don't have to think of things.

The passage above is pretty interesting. I realized that I've been trying so hard to find rest in things of the world and things that I do by myself and this is a good reminder that Jesus says "come to me" and not to other things, people, or places.

I still don't know what it looks like to fully give up control of my life, but I'm excited to see the outcome especially since I have a ton of people praying for me :)

harry potter!

So excited to see this tomorrow

when i grow up

i went to visit my habojee today and it made me really happy that he lives so close that I can see him whenever I want. He's a really lonely man and his typical days consist of either watching tv and sleeping or going to the woodbine racetrack to watch horses just walk around. He's almost 90 yet he's still walking around and has better lungs than my mom. not to mention he can talk louder than her too hehe. His hearing is going and claims that he's going to die soon, but he's a pretty stubborn man so he's got a couple more years left in him :)

But today, I learned that all his close friends have already passed away and he hangs out with people who are at least 10 years younger than him. Of course, he could be exaggerating, but I could tell he hates how he's aging alone. I told him how a lot of people don't believe me when I say he still goes out and takes the ttc despite his age and how he quit smoking cold turkey. I think that made him a little proud of himself leading him to laugh about how he used to be quite the hotty back in the day and quite the athlete.

As i was driving back home, I realized how scared I am of growing old. I'm so scared of growing old by myself too, but to be honest, I think it's a feeling that's both dreading but excited at the same time - if that makes sense. I know that when I get old, it'll be fun if there's my dear friends around and we just sit around talking.

I went to work this week and one of my patients almost missed her appointment because she was having a 3 hour lunch with her friends. I want that to be me! I want to grow old with my friends and drink tea and bake and reminisce about the days when we worried who we'd marry or about what we'd do after we graduated.

as this term comes to an end...

I'm really sad to be leaving the house at westcourt place


but so excited to go home.


quite the bittersweetness

cheesecake!

Ingredients

Graham Cracker Crust:

2 cups (200 grams) of graham wafer crumbs or finely crushed Digestive biscuits

2 tablespoons (25 grams) granulated white sugar

1/2 cup (114 grams) unsalted butter, melted

Cheesecake Filling:

24 ounces (680 grams) (3 - 8 ounces packages) cream cheese, room temperature (use full fat, not reduced or fat free cream cheese)

1 cup (200 grams) granulated white sugar

1 tablespoon (12 grams) all purpose flour

4 large eggs, room temperature

1 tablespoon heavy whipping cream

1 tsp pure vanilla extract

Preparation
1. Grease 9 inch (23 cm) round springform pan
2. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (177 degrees C)

Crust:
1. Combine the graham cracker crumbs, sugar, and melted butter.
2. Press the crumbs evenly over the bottom and about 1 inch (2.5 cm) up the sides of the springform pan.
3. Cover and refrigerate while you make the filling.

Filling:
1. Mix cream cheese, sugar and flour
2. Add the eggs, one at a time

3. Add cream, and vanilla extract
4. Remove the crust from the refrigerator and pour half the cheesecake filling into the pan.

5. Take spoonfuls of cranberry filling and swirl in the batter with a knife

6. Bake for 15 minutes

7. Lower the oven temperature to 250 F and bake for 60-70 minutes

8. Remove from oven and carefully run a knife or spatula around the inside edge of pan

9. Let cool before covering with plastic wrap and refrigerating

Serves about 12-14 people.

on a path to healing

Okay so I really apologize for the really emo posts but this is seriously what i'm going through right now. After a week of tons of crying and really trying not to go downstairs or, rather, trying to spend more time with myself, I've come to many good conclusions. So.. you know that story of the sower man who sowed seeds and some of them fell on good soil, rocks, bad soil, etc? I feel like right now, everything's falling on rocks.

This week was full of melting and breaking those rocks and hooooh man, it was painful. I think my Christian life has been really stagnant the past couple years and I've buried a lot of hurt that it's starting to catch up to me and I have to deal with it sooner or later. I've decided that I need to go home next term and if the jobmine glitch at school works, I'll be working at Sunnybrook doing research. Even though it pays crap (apparently), I'm excited to be able to go home and back to my home church with people I feel SUPER close with :)

I'm excited to move on and forget certain feelings for certain people =P I'm planning on getting another job (hopefully starbucks!) and I'm excited to finally be at home for an extended period of time.

ON a lighter note, this week's glee episode was CRAAAAZY. Totally unexpected. The girls' rendition of "living on a prayer" by Bon Jovi was amazing as well!

let's get out of this dump

So lately, I've not been feeling myself. Although I'm with people, which i normally LOVE, I no longer get energy from them. I feel constantly anxious, stress, whatever you call it, and I have no idea what it's from.

Today at Creekside, I have to admit I didn't go in with a very open heart and more out of duty? I didn't know one of the songs and they sang "Breathe" which I like to be slow because it gives me a time to meditate while singing. But they sang it too fast and at 830 in the morning, i just gave up trying to think during the song and just sang along. The lady behind me didn't clean out her nose or something because for the whole worship and during the sermon, I could only hear whistling every time she breathed. It was SO distracting.

So i prayed. I prayed that God would tune out everything and just speak to me.

Surprisingly enough, I didn't pay attention to the whistling (which i didn't realize until after) and God really showed that He's still with me even in this slump that I"m having.

Ken Taylor had asked "Are you anxious? Stressed?" Remember that the Holy Spirit lives IN you. I think I have completely forgotten this for the past couple years even. I know that Jesus gives us strength and I ask for it all the time. But I always forget there's someone else even closer to me and that He's willing to intercede for me, be there every step of the way. It was definitely a God-given reminder.

halloween adventure!

so a long time ago, my goal was to have an adventure a day... but clearly that hasn't been happening OR i haven't been very good at recording it.

today after kcf and playing our usual monopoly deal and fish (two of my favourite games currently), a couple of friends and I decided to go get mcdonalds at 3 o'clock in the morning. We got a ride there and right when we arrived, noticed a HUGE amount of people in there. It was when we realized this was the Friday before Halloween and right when all the clubs had closed.

We decided to go for it anyways and after half an hour of waiting amidst drunken yelling and the guys behind us telling us to go faster, we walked out with amazing food hehe. And then we walked to our friend's office in MC on campus and ate and just chatted for a bit. And then being weak as they were, we had to go home because they were falling asleep =P

I currently am up and planning on studying after finishing grey's anatomy because i know that if i sleep, I won't wake up for EMP =P

Enjoy some photos from my phone this term :D


far east movement came to waterloo! I was very pleased


pastor... reverend joe at the bazaar wearing part of a cotton candy machine


hanjin and I switched glasses


rainbow! from my bedroom


ruth studying while talking on the phone


will put a junior chicken in a big mac - gross -_-


it took me forever to finish this puzzle!


jenn made this amazing card tower out of monopoly deal cards


such brotherly love - joe philemon and nelson


sigh their couch is so comfortable

Micah 6:8

or·dain \ȯr-ˈdān\
:to invest officially (as by the laying on of hands) with ministerial or priestly authority

I have to admit that I had just thought this would be another big event and a big stepping stone in the life of our dearest pastor joe. It didn't even occur to me that this was a huge step for our church as whole.

It wasn't until last night, when I was thinking about how far God has brought our church that I realized how amazing and how awesome ordination is. As pastor... Rev. Bae said this morning, "we are now more than dating." A lot of people said tonight's worship was like a wedding and in a way it was; it was committing PJoe to Vaughan and us to supporting him.

To think that in the past what.. six years? Our church has gone through so much and I don't think I'll ever be able to express the heartbreak that our congregation went through. So many tears were spent on everyone's part - tears of anger, frustration, doubt, grief, sadness, you name it. I came into EM when it had no pastor. I knew how hard it was through my parents who were both on LT and search committee - both of whom aged immensely in that time of dryness.

To see people leave was probably the hardest. To see people wanted nourishment and not getting it was heart breaking. To be one of those people and not being able to do anything about it was the worst. Yet God heard our prayers. Today's ordination scripture was from Exodus and talking about how God heard the Israelites' cries and answered with Moses.

God is SO good.

There are a million things to be thankful for but ultimately, I am so thankful for God's faithfulness to Vaughan. He has delivered and grown our church in so many different ways and I don't even know where to start thanking Him.

I'm so excited to see where God is going to take us. As said in Micah 6:8, He's delivered us. All we have to do now, is follow him with humility, love mercy, and act justly.

oh man

my brain is seriously all over the place and it's only the 2nd week of school. I must sadly inform you that I'm going to be taking a 4 month break from blogging.

Seeing as I have probably very little viewers, it won't be a detrimental decision but nevertheless :)

until december,


ciao!

no bull

I've been re-watching grey's lately and bawling my eyes out. I've forgotten how emotional the whole show is and am definitely excited to watch the season premiere in the fall!

End of term drinks

Cute pub that I LOVE in Ottawa. Great food and great beer. They have a beer bible with over a hundred beers to choose from. Pretty sweet.


The alleyway to the kitchen Is really charminggg


1. Learned that a 10 oz is nothing.
2. Really like harp (English beer) but drank almost all before I remembered to take this photo

end.

this made me so excited today..

i can't wait to go back to school

this is what i want to do

Imagine a circle that contains all of human knowledge:

By the time you finish elementary school, you know a little:

By the time you finish high school, you know a bit more:

With a bachelor's degree, you gain a specialty:

A master's degree deepens that specialty:

Reading research papers takes you to the edge of human knowledge:

Once you're at the boundary, you focus:

You push at the boundary for a few years:

Until one day, the boundary gives way:

And, that dent you've made is called a Ph.D.:

Of course, the world looks different to you now:

So, don't forget the bigger picture:

Keep pushing.