fly me to the moon

loving this version by diana krall

proof i shouldn't watch scary movies

After watching a scary movie, I went up to do my PD assignment that I should be doing instead of blogging.

Of course, however, I fall asleep.

Into a dream.


where im a boy (yes, a boy -_-) named Donnie who's trying to return to my aunt, Cherie (who is my landlord) who can give me a safe place to live. I'm hiding from a millionaire who looks Robert John Burke from Gossip Girl.

Why?

I don't ever hear this but I "know" it's because he is convinced I'm a danger to society and I need to be locked up and tortured. But before I go to aunt Cherie's house I need to steal back my parents' belongings that the millionaire seized when he kidnapped and tortured my parents to death.

Weird thing about this dream, though. I'm also myself - audrey. I enter the household of this millionaire for a corporate party and i know all about donnie vs. millionaire. I wander and wind up in a room on the second floor where it smells kind of funky. I see a couple people unconscious on the floor.

I look in their hands and there's half eaten jello. I know almost instantaneously that it's "sleeping jello" and look up to find balloons with holes in them - leaking sleeping gas. I conclude that this room is important and the millionaire is definitely expecting donnie. (ps. i think i'm quite awesome with my detective skills)

i run out to the balcony only to see a trap door in the roof swing open, and donnie fall to the floor below me, while a whole bunch of balloons emitting the same gas are released with him. I look down to find his body but it's already being dragged off by the millionaire's chefs.

I wake up after seing a red balloon tied to his ankle.






i hate dreams that make your adrenaline pump.

damn scary movies.

donnie darko

i saw a pretty creepy movie today.

Here's the synopsis (with spoilers)

i don't even know what to say about it.. it's pretty cool.. but.. so.. disturbing....

yellow.

we have a love hate relationship - me and the colour, i mean.
when it's used for detail, it's nice
when there's a little bit, it's nice.
when it's in nature, it's nice.
when there's so much that it's in your face, i hate it.
i like the colour of yolk; i guess that's considered nature.

sad reality?

Today I was talking with my mom about how so many people are going into bio and wanting to go to medical school but end up so confused because they don't know what to do with their degree once they can't / decide not to go to med school.

health is an issue i'm a huge advocate for because there's so many more options out there than medical school and so many more options where you can help so many more people than if you were a doctor!

But then i was thinking about a conversation i had with someone i met at Konnect. He said that a lot of people go into architecture thinking that it's one thing, but once you get in, it's something totally different.

I'm so scared that's going to happen to me.
I'm so scared all the things i'm passionate for now won't have a job later on or there is no job.
I'm so scared that although I want to develop a mental health system for Korea and Canada, no one will listen to me, and I'll be stranded doing government work where everything is drowning in bureaucracy and moving at the speed of molasses.
I'm scared that I'll become someone who's mind become stagnant in the day to day routine of work.

I know a lady who's an accountant. She was originally in bio.
My aunt has a PhD in organic chem. She's a homemaker.
I know a pharmacist who found her job boring so she went to teaching.

I don't have anything against these people.

I just like to know my future won't take sharp turns or that I'll be bored with my degree...

to my future husband,

Today at KCF we talked about you. We had to list qualities that we want in our ideal man. Here's what i put/currently like:

1. eyes that smile (눈 웃음)
2. christian
3. musically talented
4. athletic
5. a leader
6. "teachable heart"
7. humble
8. funny and likes to joke around
9. passionate
10. reads!
11. thoughtful

and much more!

I don't know if you have all of these qualities but if you don't, it's okay! I just hope you have 10/11 of them - haha just kidding. Okay maybe like the important ones :) i know i don't have all of these qualities too but i'm praying that with time, i'll become more like the qualities I want to see in you!

I'm really excited to meet you and although this may sound creepy, hopefully when we look back on this, it will look more sweet than creepy - haha. Hopefully youre doing well and having fun in school!!!

Audrey

at 4AM...

it's amazing how your body wakes you up to go pee - instead of just letting you go. There is still that alert sense!

On a different note, I realized how busy I am and how busy i'm going to be for the next couple of months. Here's a look at my goals and my things to do:

goals
study the book of James
read 3 books
watch 10 good movies (have watched 1 - Changelings)
get through my mcat book on my own (I'm still in the physics unit T_T)
finish my work term report BEFORE december (topic pending approval)
go to urbana 09 (registration paid)
organize my iTunes (just for you, Jenny) (I'm sorry my dear, i havent done much with this)
take initiative at work (done a couple times - not enough)
go to 1 festival in toronto

current projects
work term report
topic: exercise vs. fractures caused by falls OR exercise vs. falls in general (a little harder)
PD5 - project management
5 more quizzes
assignment2: "starting a project" paper
assignment 3: cost/resource control, international vs. non-international projects, selection of project team members
Konnect Project
january - launch
march - high school retreat
KCSF Case Competition
program/event that will help the korean canadian community
thinking something along the lines of fitness awareness or something like that
Urbana fundraising
personal contacts
church food market
searching for ideas T_T

gadget freak

So as my painfully long 3-year contract with Telus comes to a close (December 27), I've been looking around for providers, plans, phones - a new life! Alright, a little exaggerated, but I'm stoked for my next phone.

The Contestants


1. iPhone
I know I vowed never to submit to the hype, but I swear, their marketing is amazing. Not only do i want the endless amount of apps, but it's so... multi-functional! which most of you should know, is what j'adore~


2. HTC Dream or the G1
I've wanted this for the longest time - it's just.. so pretty! And it's a smart phone - oh so convenient


3. LG Lollipop
Other than the fact that this was 2NE1's first released song (with big bang), i love the lollipop. With its customizable LED front for each person, and it's really pretty inside, i would LOVE to have it. Downside? It's not even out in Canada or the States and it's gonna be uber expensive - which i dont like because i totally regret paying 220 for my current phone.

slight autism

Autism: "brain development disorder characterized by impaired social interaction and communication, and by restricted and repetitive behavior" - Wikipedia (don't judge)
Asperger's Syndrome: "known as high functioning autistics because they can more or less operate in the day-to-day world" - jPOD by Douglas Coupland

I think i'm slightly autistic - or have Asperger's syndrome... a tiny... bit - haha

I was reading jPod by Douglas Coupland and a character was describing the autism traits that are found in her co-workers.

Character: Ethan
Trait: hyperacuity - certain sound frequencies make him go crazy (some, people can't hear)
Me: the high pitched whirring of my laptop charger drives me crazy

Character: Kam and Steve
Trait: both have virtually no sense of humour
Me: Sometimes I'll find my self where i'm like, I know that's funny.. but why am i not laughing..

i believe everyone has an autistic trait in them. Just my two cents.


Post Note (for dolly) - autistics are apparently really sensitive to smell - in the book, they hate the smell of McD's so it's called... the Taint

skiddadle - part 2

"You're so Indie"
What's Indie?
Popseoul labels Loveholic as "Indie"
I like loveholic.
huh?

--------------------------------

Logical:
I'm not going. I should tell them.
Illogical:
I'm not going. Let them figure it out.

--------------------------------

If only I did that yesterday
damnit.

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jPod is a funny book
I like quirky people.

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IRIS is out. Must. Watch.
T.O.P *swoon*

--------------------------------

Dude. Go online

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I get frustrated easily.
Not mad.
Why can't I learn to expect less of people?
Is this turning emo?

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GAH! the sinus pain.

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skiddadle

It's cold. Freezing cold. Time to put away the flats.
There's a couple. Oh, they're hugging. Must be warm.
Did it just get colder?

---------------------------------

our boss is back.
it's quiet.
REAL quiet.

---------------------------------

enrollment was today
i got into kin 100 - anatomy
i wasn't afraid of failure; i was excited
i got home and freaked out.
i'm better now; neutral is a better word

---------------------------------

manuscript bible study with mackcf small group
it was fun
i missed studying the Word

---------------------------------

i rented out jpod from mills library @ mac
people around me were studying for midterms
i was on the couch laughing.
it's a funny book

---------------------------------

i finished the glass castle
it's a good book.
what's it trying to say, though?

---------------------------------

sniff sniff
i think i'm getting sick
i never get sick
젠장

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warm bed
down blanket
warm slippers

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tomorrow is dinner with eumee
tomorrow is 1 to 7 degrees with a frost warning
tomorrow is a new day
hooray!

today, i was...

robbed.

check your bank accounts, maybe you were too.

don't cheat yourself

I've been having a lot of dreams lately and I don't always know what they mean (like the boot one), but I think it means I have a lot on my mind (고민 is the perfect word).

Yesterday's KCF was pretty awesome, humbling, fun - i needed it. Not that I've had a tough week or anything but I think living on my own, I'm getting a lot more time to think about myself and God, which can be a good and a bad thing.

KCF had bible study and we studied the chapter that says this:

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?

Three things here.

1. Do not worry about my life. I had a dream last night where Dolly was going to her KIN100 class and I had a huge irresistable urge to go as well (I really want to take this class!) I was in the class and it was a great class but I woke up and panicked because lately, I haven't done so great in school. And then this got me to think about my whole med school dilemma again and it was a mess of panic in my mind.

2. But then I prayed about it and I was pretty much suddenly calmed as if someone was telling me that if I rely on Him, He'll provide because we're that much more important to Him than birds and birds don't even have to prepare food or whatever. Not that I can just sit back and laze away, but that if I do try my hardest (I don't think I have yet to be 100% honest), He will provide.

3. I've never really enjoyed art. I am trying because its something that's so dear to my brother's and my friends' hearts. It's something I feel like I have to understand but apparently it's something to "feel" in the words of a friend. I saw Salvador Dali's clock painting in grade 6 and didn't really like it. It was a little too... different for me.

I saw it this morning and was really sad. It's October already and I have accomplished a lot of my goals, but I feel like I cheated myself with simple goals that I didn't really have to work for. Time is slipping away, and I really want to change so that I can push myself.

i want...

to be a kid again.

digging, boots, and my grade 8 science teacher?

I just woke up because I had the weirdest dream ever.

I was at the park at my house and there was this guy giving away free RUBBER boots. Thing is, everyone was allowed only one pair (and no one broke this rule). And these boots were really nice! But they were stored underground and you had to dig for them.

Luckily, he had a "boot detector" which could detect your size as well as colour. But people kept digging so slow and by the time it was my turn, he had to go home. I really wanted a pair (since all my shoes get my feet wet when it rains) so I decided to dig just anywhere.

I dug enough so that I hit a tunnel where all the shoes were semi-buried in the walls and in the floor of the tunnel - sort of like the catacombs. Some of the shoes were cracked, which i threw to the side. A lot of them were purple and pink - I discarded these.

I pulled out shoe after shoe looking for a size 7 and a half or at least a 7 or an 8 and could find nothing! And on top of that, I was specifically looking for yellow boots - I discarded green because Dolly had green boots. How stubborn I am.

Unbeknown to me, the hole had grown to let in more light as I searched. But then I heard voices. My grade 8 science teacher, now a hobo, was drinking hot chocolate with her other hobo buddy and talking about running away to hawaii.

I hid because i probably shouldn't have been looking for boots on my own, but she found me and asked me how I was doing. I told her the usual - where i go to school, what i'm studying, my future goals. I should have paid more attention to the dream, because I don't remember what my goals were.

End of dream.

a capella on Youtube

I love people who can do a capella with themselves! Here are some of my all time faves from youtube.

1. ApprenticeA's tribute to John Williams' greatest hits of all time with the famous lines from Star Wars. This is my personal favourite!


2. daiyel's cover of Jason Mraz's I'm Yours


3. jibcraip's cover of michael Jackson's You Rock My World with 38 voices


4. David Choi's I Fart Like Everyone Else

with great power...

... comes great responsibility.

At today's orthopedic resident's day one of the residents said that it's dangerous to extrapolate data because it's hard to say that your research will apply in the real world.

Darwin wrote the Theory of Natural Selection and then extrapolated his data to postulate the theory of evolution.

Today, evolutionists have changed their theory saying that we did not evolve from monkeys, but monkeys have evolved from us.

Strange, no?

This week, I...

realized that being a research ASSISTANT sucks. I want to RESEARCH.

finished 3 books. Secret Life of Bees is a good one.

realized I haven't been reading my Bible.

enjoyed studying at the Mac library for my MCATs and realized I don't suck at physics as much as I thought I did.

gave up on doing my tax returns by myself.

made another goal - be more productive each week that I live!

Before I leave, can I just say... HURRAH for cold weather! Finally the weather is not so humid and I can walk around with the cool breeze that tickles my bones!

It snowed in Waterloo - crazy weather.

it's 1AM in the morning

What am i doing up? ('tis a genuine question to myself)

Many things are on my mind:
1. why are income tax forms so difficult to fill out?!?!
2. don't forget to call ivcf busses to figure out cost to go to urbana. don't forget. don't forget
3. my landlord gave me rent receipts for only 4 months SIGH
4. so much to see at nuit blanche, not enough time - any suggestions?
5. *sniff* my bank account
6. i know not worrying about the future is good but is this going to the point of apathy? pure laziness?
7. mcats mcats mcats

and much more

I need to take a minute or two tomorrow to organize my brain. For now, i will try to sleep.

Good night world!

PS: Welcome october!